Cancer Dancer

The dancer is a patient and must be made to comply. They cannot be trusted with their own sensory perceptions. They suffer from hallucinations of pain and delusions of exhaustion. There is no such thing as malpractice when it comes to the dancer. You cannot be punished enough. Your skin is an interface for needles and pressure cuffs. Your skin exists only to alert him to your mistakes. You must dance in a state of exposure, so he can inspect you for bruises, stains of clumsiness. Do not think your body is something to be admired. You are a disgusting male. But you are not a man. You are stunted. Your anorexic ribs are a kind of descended gynecomastia. Your bulge is sexless, juvenile, and clownlike. Your body is the mannequin and the dress at the same time. Beauty can never exist for you as a noun, but it might as a verb.

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cunt toward enemy [s3e9] escapement

The father keeps a tube of lipstick on his nightstand. Lazur sees it on the rare occasions he is called upstairs, to carry the man’s briefcase or do his tie when the man is falling over drunk. Lazur always assumed it was a memento of the absent mother, until he saw how every trace of her was removed from the house, except for the subliminal rubbish in the basement.

Rich men are freaky. But he’s driven the man to secret and depraved gatherings, and never brought him back with makeup on. The lipstick feels wrong to look at. A sense of something black, congealed, and burnt—yet oozing with endless, leechlike intelligence. The walls must be flaking with toxic pigment. Cadmium red. Lazur holds his breath, and knots the tie.

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July Megabugpost

Closed Tear

small story for people who love libraries or want to see a library in xrafstar world

Immune Privilege

this is about Cancer going blind. and his sister.
do not read unless you desire the “family gothic”…

✦ new page on site about corruption…and how internet/phones/etc work (or don’t) in xrafstar world.

vich made this pic about our game…Cancer and his operant conditioning handler…it’s so…so cute…

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Closed Tear

You are in the library.

No. Sink deeper. Before you were sprayed with the nasty corrosive gunk of ego and culture. Before you were covered in linguistic contaminants. Before you were sterilized and cauterized, and the wounds of your mind were still open and fresh.

You are on a distant island of this fantastic but mundane empire. The sun is fading through the windows, smeared into burning droplets. You came for shelter from the rain, and the mosquitoes. They lay their eggs in standing water, so all week they have been breeding and you don’t want to get bit or have to drink bitter quinine to stave off super-malaria.

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Junebug Roundup

new Cunt Toward Enemy

Cancer tboy endometriosis strip mall AU continues to captivate the minds of freaks nationwide

I designed the upcoming cassette edition of Rook’s Ugly Death No Redemption Angel Curse I Love You 📼, and redid the album art as well, since bad health kept me from doing it to my satisfaction the first time around.

the tape sleeve/J-card has a bunch of cool drawings and text, can’t wait to share it. already saw some wonderful fanart of the cover…

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Coffee Shop AU * act 1

I work at the strip mall coffee shop. Scratchy black shirt that itches on my clammy back. Slacks my ass looks too big in. Baseball hat that crushes my sweaty black hair into my ears.

I lean forward to hide my tits. I’ve become a goblin thing, using my shoulders and the bagginess of my shirt to pretend there’s nothing there. Hides my name tag too. HI I’M CANCER. My black cap pulled over my head, just an acne-scarred mouth, they think I’m a high school boy. I mumble so they can’t hear my cleft palate wheeze.

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cunt toward enemy [s3e5] get well soon

Inanna, daughter of the Moon, put on her regal garment, hung a ravishing sash around her neck,
With fearsome, terrifying radiance she bedizened her brow,
She drew a carnelian necklace with rosettes around her divine throat,
She made a hero’s gesture with the seven-lobed mace in her right hand.
She set her foot on the deep blue step.

— The Exaltation of Inanna

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